The other day I tried to hard-boil eggs for the first time. The first batch came out underdone, but a friend gave me a different method and the next batch came out fine. But then I ruined them by trying to turn them into egg salad. See, what I really wanted was an egg salad sandwich (I can't seem to find a place that makes good ones in the area). I had a vague idea that egg salad was egg plus mayonnaise plus maybe other stuff, but I'm not a huge fan of mayonnaise so I figured I could ignore that, and probably all the other stuff. I was so, so wrong.
I have this friend who, lately, will not stop replacing lyrics in random songs with the names of Pokémon.
Right before Wikipedia blacked out, my friends and I celebrated by playing several rounds of Wikipedia golf. I don't know what rules people normally play by, but we decided to forbid the use of Ctrl+F, which made it difficult to find good links in huge articles. I wish I could tell you what articles we used, but I can't.
I recently admitted to myself that I secretly love Taylor Swift. It was tough, but they say acceptance is the first step on the road to recovery.
My phone is a RAZR – not one of the new ones. You might be too young to remember this (oh God), but they were really popular about five years ago, and that's about how old this phone is. Most of the screen has broken off. My girlfriend heckles me about this a lot. "Man, you could look up [that thing you want to look up on Wikipedia] if you had a smartphone. Except you don't. Loser. Also, that broken screen's sharp now. It's going to cut you. Or worse, me."