Please note:

The MIT Welcome Center and Admissions Office will be closed for winter break December 23 through January 4. We will reopen on Monday, January 5, 2026.

MIT blogger CJ Q. '23

whiteout conditions by CJ Q. '23

forget your mission, just get out alive

whiteout conditions is a song by the new pornographers, and it’s about depression. ac newman’s lyrics hit deep, with lines like “so you crumbled, you doubled your dosage / you wanna go, said the inhibitor blocking the passage” and “got so hooked on a feeling, i started dealing / in a stage of grief so demanding” and “maybe you riot for nothing—it’s just a bad hand”.

the chorus has been stuck in my head for the last few days, because it’s been such a mood. every morning, i wake up, and i have this vague desire to go to classes and do work. but i don’t actually want to. i wake up and i’m already tired. i no longer know if i want to go to my classes because i genuinely enjoy them, or because of the inertia.

what’s the point? why am i doing all of this?

text "only want to get to work" above drawing of laptop

text: "but every morning i'm too sick to drive", over drawing of someone lying on bed looking at their phone

text: "suffering whiteout conditions", over drawing of someone lying on bed, staring up

text: "forget your mission, just get out alive", over drawing of someone lying on bed, staring in distance

text: "only want to glean the purpose", over drawing of empty bed

text: "only to scratch the surface raise the plow", over drawing of someone sitting in front of laptop

text: "suffering whiteout conditions", over drawing of someone sitting on a chair

text: "forget your mission, just get out somehow" over drawing of someone sitting on chair