So the annual no-problem-set-fest known as IAP really comes to an end today. Mitra mentioned that on Monday, we have registration day, and then the first day of classes is Tuesday, YIKES!
But I didn’t get through IAP without learning a little bit, at least.
Let’s hop in the TechnoTime Machine and jump back 9 years to when I was in 6th grade, every weekend, I’d spend 4 hours every Saturday at etiquette school trying to learn how to ask a girl for a dance to how to enjoy the whipped cream from my sundae without ending up with my food on my face. It’s almost been a decade since my etiquette training, but fear not, I’ve renewed my Boy Scout Etiquette Badge.
Another snapshot as to why today was also very important, a snapshot of the dinner table (me, my mom, and my three younger brothers)
Me: Did you burp?
Brother 1: It wasn’t me. (To Brother 2) Do you have your elbows on the table?
Brother 2: (Moves elbows off table, quickly) You’re supposed to cut your spaghetti while you’re eating it!
Brother 3: Shut up!
Mom: Do I need to get out Emily Post?
If I had this conversation today, I could safely tell my mom, “No.”
I went to CHARM SCHOOL today.
Charm School is an annual IAP event in it’s 14th year where faculty and staff from all around MIT help members of the community practice better etiquette. There’s a lot to learn, and there are a number of tricks and tips I learned today that I’ve never learned before.
For example, do you want a fail proof way to know which bread and drink are yours?
If you make a “b” with your left hand and a “d” with your right hand, the “b” hand is where your bread is and the “d” hand is where your drink is.
On top of re-learning my table manners, the Ballroom Dance Team was giving rumba lessons.
My friend Yonas practiced some cell phone etiquette.
Laura Stuart was giving lessons on dating and how to let a person know you don’t want a second date.
The Chorallaries performed “Pomp and Circumstance” on the kazoo.
We did arrive at Charm School fashionably late, and unfortunately we did not graduate. We only acquired 1 of the 6 credits required for our Bachelors. On top of not getting my degree, I also missed “Flirting 101” which I could have acquired advanced placement for.
If you want proof, try out one of my nerdy pickup lines.
“Do you have a library card? ‘Cause I’m checking you out.”
“Baby, can I be your DNA helicase? ‘Cause I want to unzip your genes.”
If you can top that, post a comment. I’ll confer you an honorary degree.