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MIT student blogger Allan K. '17

hello, after six years by Allan K. '17

i have been here and there, the last six years.
i think a lot of people have felt this way, because of the way
that many people got very sick and the world changed.

this, and many things, and other reasons
that i find harder to talk about,
have changed me and my relationship to writing.
this is not possible to stop, how change
continues to happen. i think i am learning to accept this.
i have learned other things as well. like how to play a game
where i try to escape from hell, and how to play another game
where i work with my friends and try to not die to things
that can hurt us. and another game about caring
for flying (and some not-flying) animals. the ones that can’t fly
are still this type of animal. this is a good way to remember that
you are more than what you are able to do.
by chance, god will sometimes let me learn a thought, and
i try hard to give the thought a good home in my body.
one of these thoughts is the idea that relationships are the
piece from which all change can be built. that all good things
are done with other people. i wonder often, how i have the
good chance to meet thoughts like this and live at the same time
as so many good people who write such good thoughts.
who are your people? who do you take care of
and allow to take care of you? these are the questions i am still
learning to hold in my heart.
i am also trying to think about how to build things that help,
rather than hurt, the relationships we have with each other.
we live in a world with lots of ways to talk to each other,
using things that carry words between people and between things.
a lot of people are building things that are even faster at carrying words.
a lot of other people think that we should just stop using these things so much,
and go outside more and touch more trees.
but i still believe there is hope for us. the friends i have made and kept,
in places that aren’t real except in words and the things that
carry the words, continue to give me hope.
as another person says, we must understand where these things come from,
and how they work, and who makes them work,
and who really needs them to work,
because that is where we find our care for each other.
we can learn a lot by thinking together with our friends.
i am trying to return to school now so i can think more about this,
in a more focused way, with the help of good teachers.
i am waiting to see where i get in.
it has been almost six years since i was last here.
only god knows who i may be in another six.
with love <3