As I’ve said many a time, but will say again for new readers, I live in Burton-Conner. In Burton-Conner we have kitchens, kitchens for cooking our own food, if we so choose. Many people embrace the kitchens and cook almost all of their meals there. I’m not very cooking-inclined, nor do I really feel like learning right away, so I don’t use the kitchens very often. This story, however, doesn’t concern me, it concerns the girl across the hall.
Sara ’12 is also a resident of Conner 2. You may remember her from giant fish fame.
She also doesn’t cook. In fact, I think she and I are the only two who don’t even really own dishes, we just use disposable dishes. Anyway, I make no secrets about not cooking. James ’11 will be the first to tell you that the day he saw me cooking corned beef hash was one of the most miraculous days ever. Sara, however, still “pretends” to cook.
Sara’s menu consists of two items, soup and cereal, both of which she fills too full. People on the floor who do cook, however, know that Sara is bluffing, that soup and cereal doesn’t count as real cooking (as much as she says it does). Teasing and taunting happens (all in good fun of course), but Sara stands by her soup and cereal. One day, the taunting and the teasing came to a head.
Sara misspoke one day, and Yuki, one of the most active kitchen-monkeys on the floor thought he heard her say that she burnt her cereal. Not oatmeal, not soup, but cereal. He couldn’t believe it, so he asked her. . .
“Did you just say you burnt your cereal?” Believing he was kidding, Sara responded in jest.
“Oh, yeah, oops.”
This is a critical time for both Sara and Yuki. This is when Sara realized Yuki believed her, and when Yuki realized he could hold this against her forever. Sara wasn’t thrilled, Yuki was ecstatic.
Soon the entire floor knew about Sara burning her cereal and there were rumors abound about how it may have happened. Let’s be honest, burning cereal isn’t easy. We figured we could figure it out, but in the end, we realized that in order to burn cereal Sara must have been a spectacularly bad cook.
Time passed, the incident was generally forgotten, except for the occasional jab when she was spotted walking extremely slowly with a very full bowl of cereal. Then, one day, the most magnificent picture on the internet was discovered.
Words . . . Cannot . . . Describe