list of things that refill my will to live by CJ Q. '23
things to do when i don't want to do anything
- hugs
- thinking about hugs
- remembering that one time in a summer camp two years ago, when we were all crashing andrew’s room and it was the halfway point of the camp and we were all sad about it being halfway over and we hugged each other for a solid five minutes and that was probably the longest hug in my life
- thinking that if i buy another thing from chipotle with the app, i will have enough points to get a free entree
- celeste, but not actually playing celeste (although that is fun), just listening to the soundtrack or watching other people play it
- talking to a friend with more sense than me, which, as it happens, is most of my friends
- this surreal video about studying math because the experience of waiting and frustration and enlightenment is, thankfully, universal
- sunsets, but only when it’s not freezing cold outside like it is now
- reading the messages that my high school classmates wrote for me before we graduated. i haven’t talked to any of them in forever and i’m scared to because i wouldn’t know what to say, but i have some good memories of high school
- one night i had a breakdown at 2 in the morning in the middle of a lounge and that night i got a long message from someone saying that i was one of the people who made them feel most welcome and it made me cry thinking i actually made someone feel like that and i have a screenshot of that message saved and i read it every time i feel like i’m worthless
- this blog post on days when i feel like i’ve gotten absolutely nothing done, like today, because today was a day that didn’t have classes and i said i’d catch up on my work and i just played hollow knight and then lied on my bed and sleep and be sad
- old photos
- fun’s carry on. actually, fun’s barlights
- going into an empty mit classroom and thinking about all the things that must have happened in there in the past. how many secrets has that classroom bore witness to?
- thinking about “when all of this is over”, without really specifying what “all of this” is, because it feels like it grows every day
- deleting a line from my todo list, even if it’s something as simple as “send that email”
- playing board games with people. hello podmates
- niche memes. right now im really enjoying /r/hollowknightmemes
- the fray’s how to save a life
- sleeping at last’s saturn
- okay i asked the bloggers to make a collaborative spotify playlist so here you go: