Adventures in Logan Airport by Keri G. '10
In which I attempt to fly back to Florida. Written during a too-long wait in an uncomfortable airport chair.
The other day, when I stopped in the Admissions Office to annoy a few of its regular denizens (Hi, Nance. You too, Ben.) I was asked why my blog didn’t give off quite the same sarcastic vibe that I usually exude in person. Or maybe this was asked by someone else entirely. Meh. Same difference.
Anyway, I offer you a tale of suspense and… you know, other things: my last ten hours, which shall from here on out be referred to as “Adventures in Logan Airport.”
First of all, my first name is Keri-Lee.
At least, that’s what I’ve always thought. Due to what the Florida Department of Transportation calls a “processing error” and what I chalk up to general incompetence, my driver’s license states otherwise. According to this great, all-powerful piece of plastic, my first name and middle initial are “Keri L,” rather than the correct “Keri-Lee A.”
Well, that’s all fine and good, Keri, but what does this have to do with anything at all? you may ask.
In all honesty, nothing. There is no reason for you to be informed of this. You do, however, need to know about my adventures in Logan Airport during the last three hours, though, and this is absolutely crucial information. Or something. Whatever.
So in preparation for a trip to good ol’ South Florida, I checked in and printed out my boarding pass yesterday. Seat 5D. A window. Nice. At least I’ll have a lovely view of the night sky for three and a half hours because THE SUN GOES DOWN HERE BEFORE 5PM EVERY NIGHT WHY WHY WHY, right?
I walked across the street to the Kendall/MIT T station around 1:45 and easily made it to Logan. No problem. Took less than half an hour, and I got to talk to Bayo ’10 on the way there. Public transportation is god. (Well, maybe not. Humor me here, all right?)
My first indication that this would not be your everyday bit of fun in an airport should have been the line for bag check-in trailing along nearly the entirety of Terminal C. see, this line was the kiosk/bag drop for online check-in. No bureaucracy here, just a drop-off and go. But hey, it moved fairly quickly. And it’s two days before Christmas, so it’s excusable, right?
Cut to Line #2: Security.
So I stood in Line #2 for approximately twenty minutes before the standard Photo ID/boarding pass check, at which point this occurred:
TSA employee with a feeble grasp of the English language: “Go back check-in!”
Me: “Um, excuse me?”
TSA employee: “ID and boarding pass no match exact!”
Me: “Oh, I see. The name on my driver’s license is incorrect – I’ve been trying to get that changed for nearly two years. It’s correct on my Social Security card, though, and I know that’s not a photo ID but I have both that card and my license and my green card right here…”
TSA employee, who by now is really starting to irritate me: “Change name on boarding pass! I no know Keri L and Keri-Lee same person! Go back check-in!”
Well, fine . Never mind the fact that I’d waited in line for about an hour already (what, do these people just assume that we civilians all stand around in too-long lines for kicks and giggles?) but what could I do? So back to ticketing I went. This time, I had to go in the longer, less efficient line for counter service. After forty-five minutes of waiting, I finally reached a counter where a kind-looking lady in her fifties easily fixed the problem. I returned to the line for security – which was, of course, even longer than before. Forty minutes of that. Let’s hear it one time for waiting. In fact, let’s hear it again. And again. And again.
At 4:25, I reached my gate and prepared to sit around until a 5:30 departure.
Only to find the passengers for the 3:20 flight before mine still waiting to get on their plane and leave.
I checked the departure board.
Departure time: 5:25 P
Status: DELAYED UNTIL 6:06 P DELAYED
By the way, the shrill, piercing noise of a fire alarm is very, very present.
Is this related to MIT? Other than my leaving it for what may shape up to be three very long weeks, no. We do have lives outside of the Institute, you know. ^_^