Lie la lying down by Sam M. '07
Sometimes there are perks to attending a school with a notorious reputation for producing stressed students.
I’ve got an exam in twenty minutes, but I wouldn’t be able to concentrate unless I shared with you guys the most exciting e-mail I’ve received in a while.
Date: Tue, 04 Oct 2005 15:21:31 -0400 [03:21:31 PM EDT]
From: Dan Kirsch
To: [Burton Conner Discussion]
Subject: Massages tonight!
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Hey, B-C students!
In conjunction with the Housemasters and house government, I have arranged for free massages for Burton-Conner students! What that means is that licensed massage therapists come in and provide free 8-10 minute massages for Burton-Conner students who sign up in
advance. (Be sure to stop by and see if there are any open spots if you weren’t able to put your name down before they start!)
The first night is tonight, and they will repeat throughout the semester roughly every other week. They will not always be on Tuesday so that those of you who have commitments on Tuesday nights will be able to take advantage of them. I will announce each session
either the day of or the day before, and have a sign-up sheet at the front desk. The therapists are here from 8:00 PM – 10:00 PM, and will be in the TV lounge on the ground floor behind the vending machines. Please let me know if you have any questions, and I hope to see you there!
Residential Life Associate
Usuaully you have to join a sorority or some kind of crazily well-funded student organization to get these. All I have to do is live in my dorm. I can handle that. I’ll let you know how it all went a bit later tonight.
UPDATE: The exam… uh, I could have studied a little more for that dirty little puppy, I think. I’m worried some of the questions were deceptively simple. There was one killer 30-point question about oxygen mass transport into the Islets of Langerhans that nobody had ever see before. However, I was a particular fan of question 4–it involved figuring out how long to heat a “sweet italian sausage” in 95 C water to cook it to an internal temperature of 75 C. Because I’m twelve (years old, not the course), I did enjoy the problem’s instructions to “model the sausage as an infinitely long cylinder” and to account for the “thermal diffusivity of the sausage.”
The massage was divine, if only a brief 8 minutes in length. When she started working on my calves. I feel bad because they can only massage 25 students every two weeks, so I should probably wait a few weeks before asking for another. Oh, I squandered my first massage opportunity. I have squandered my resistance on an upper back full of pleasantness.
Such are free massages.
You can have my massage Sam. Take it you have earned it… I don’t know how, but it must be true.